I don't expect to be blogging tomorrow, so I thought I'd do something to honor Mother's Day with this one.  First of all, to anyone out there who is a mom:  hug your kids!  I know they drive you crazy, I know this is the hardest job I can think of... and I know that they are the best thing that ever happened to you in your life-- just like mine are.  Second, to anyone out there who has a mom:  hug your mom!  Provided she wasn't Joan Crawford or some other seriously mentally/physically/emotionally damaging type, I would be willing to bet she deserves a pat on the back from you for doing a good job raising you.  Third, if you don't fit either one of those categories, hug someone special in your life who helps fill that space in your life.  No one should be so lonely to not have that.  Except the Yeti... and all of you know why.
    So a little about my mom now, since she's a big part of the strange psychological experiment known as "The Way I Am".  My mom is an amazing person.  When I was very young she had to work very hard to make sure that I had food and pants that fit.  When I was school age she was blessed with the opportunity to do what she valued most:  stay home full time to take care of me (and the two younger ones that eventually came along).  She was the involved, room-mother-and-PTA type, which was very fun for me because I got to know what was going on for our class parties and I was able to leave with her after it was over-- thus evading the usual hour-long bus ride home.
    As I got older, I started to realize that my mom fell into the categories of 'conservative' and 'cautious'.  To me, that translated to 'strict' and 'crazy basketcase worrywart'.  That, of course, can be attributed to the belief I held that I was 'invincible' and could 'take care of myself'.  (As a side note, I'm in so much trouble when my girls get older.  It's gonna come back to me tenfold.  Frak.)  I wasn't allowed to do basically anything a large portion of the other kids my age were allowed to do.  I followed the rules and was a good kid-- I was just P.O.ed about it.  I wanted to be a rebel, but I had been raised too well to actually go do it.
    We didn't see eye to eye when I met my husband, probably because I went off the deep end with the rebellion I finally displayed fully.  That was the result of a nineteen year-old Goody TwoShoes falling head over heels in love with a 24 year old bartender.  To say the least, I stopped respecting such boundaries as a curfew or coming home for anything but food or laundry. 
    Once we got through that patch (and E turned out to actually be my Prince Charming and not some random guy she was going to have to pick up the pieces after), I realized how special she really is.  Since I became a full-blown, pay-my-own-bills adult she and I have developed a very special friendship.  She loves E like a son and respects our marriage and our hard work to forge our own way for our family.  Even when I call her to vent about whatever is bothering me (my kids, my husband, my job, my laundry...) she doesn't judge or worry that my marriage is imploding or my kids are actually going to get hung from the ceiling by their big toes if they don't STOP THAT THISVERYMINUTEIMEANIT!!!  She just listens and does her best to either inject some humor into the situation or share a similar story from her life experience to remind me that I'm not the first person to go through this, nor will I be the last.  Even when I ask for advice directly she is very hesitant to give it.  She truly believes in my ability to make the right decision for myself and my family without her telling me what that decision needs to be.  That very thing is what usually gives me the confidence I need to find that right answer and keep working toward my own personal "ever after".  She prays for me every time I ask her to (and probably a lot more than that!) and she even asks for my advice sometimes.  Too bad I haven't quite learned enough from her yet to keep me from saying, "Well, you know what you should do?  You should just..."  I can't help it.  I'm a firstborn.  Ask for advice and you're going to get it whether you really want it or not.  And sometimes even if you don't ask.
    So my advice to all of you is to have a great day.  That sounds like a lot more fun than the alternative.

CL