Here is a little something I jotted down while my internet was down:

    I am handwriting today's entry because my cable is out, so I have no internet at the moment.  "And what is today's topic?", you may be asking.  Surprise:  it's the awful customer service I received from Time Warner Cable!
    I came home today from running errands and let my girls turn on the TV while I unloaded the bread, apple juice and allergy medicine.  Maybe five minutes  later, I heard a POP outside, similar to a firecracker going off.  Then the TV went black  I looked up TWC's phone number and called to notify them of the situation-- not trusting an automated system to catch the issue without customers pointing it out.  The lady I spoke to-- whose name I did not catch of course-- is apparently owed a living by this very planet we inhabit.  I told her I heard a pop and then all my cable services went out.  After way to much dead air, she finally told me there was no outage in my area and we would have to schedule a service call.  Another long pause.  Then I was told she could schedule it between 11-2 tomorrow.  Confused as to what someone wearing plastic shower caps over their shoes to protect my carpet coming in and inspecting my cable box in my house was going to do about whatever blew at the top of a pole down the street, I asked her what they would be doing or looking for during this service call.*  She said they would have to come out and service my equipment.  I wondered at that point if we were even speaking the same language because that certainly did not in any way answer the question I had asked her.  So I tried again.  "What exactly are they looking for that could be the cause of my problem?  What kinds of things are they going to check on a service call?"  Her answer:  "I 'm not a technician so I don't know."  So I asked if there was anyone there I could talk to who could answer my question.  You know what her answer was?  "No, not really."  "REALLY?!?"  Did you honestly just say that to me?  I've just called customer service and pushed the button for 'technical support' and there is NO ONE in your building who can answer that question??  I kept all of these thoughts in my head after the "REALLY?!?" part and spent a long silent moment praying for God to come down Himself and sew my lips shut so I wouldn't bring down the thunder on this woman who was so clearly asking for it!!  Only at that point did she mention that she could try to reset things from where she was.  I was reasonably certain that wouldn't work, but decided to try it.  I have to work tomorrow and E is ridiculously sick.  A service call tomorrow that will just tell us someone has to come back and climb a pole later was just not going to work for me.  So I started unplugging things according to her directions.  In the middle of it all, she says, "Oh.  I'm getting a message that says there is an outage in your area.  It's sending me the message because enough people called to report problems."  So.... now what?  "They'll come out and fix it"  Like, right away?  "Yes, as soon as they can."  So I don't have to schedule a service call?  "No, they'll just come fix it.  So that's good... for you."  Nice.  "Ma'am, I do apologize for any inconvenience."  Long pause.  Oh, is she actually waiting for me to say "It's okay?"  because it's not.  Outages happen.  I'm fine with that inconvenience.  What I'm not fine with is her getting paid to not even attempt to be of any help to me!  So she had to just move on:  "Is there anything else I can help you with today?"
    Is she kidding?

CL

*As a side note, a good friend of our family does service calls for the cable company.  I think I should call and ask him what they would look for so I don't have to ask the rude and unhelpful people on the phone any more questions.  The people who come to my house and look me in the eye seem to be so much nicer than the ones who can hide behind their headset.