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Ode To E

    My husband is the butt of a lot of jokes on this blog.  Ask any sitcom writer: bumbling spouse= funny.  Competent, loving and considerate spouse= boring.  And everyone knows that I generally intend to get a laugh or two when I write.  However, I inspired myself yesterday when I wrote about my grandpa and made mention of a happy reunion with my grandma.  After having been separated by an ocean from E for nine days while he was away on business recently, I feel like I should show a little public appreciation for him.  After all, I do really like having him around.
    E makes me laugh.  He has the goofiest, offbeat sense of humor-- the exact kind that tickles my funny bone.  When he gets a moment to lighten up he can be about as silly as a person can be.  My girls love it, too.  It's fun to watch them be ridiculous together.
    E is incredibly smart.  He enjoys challenging himself.  He is never content to just be.  He always wants to be more.  Never have I met a more driven person.  Anything he puts his mind to, you can bet he will accomplish.
    E is a studmuffin.  Seriously.  I thought he was out of my league when I first saw him, but he noticed me.  Next month will be ten years since then, and he's still dreamy.  Not that I would stop loving him if he became disfigured.  I'm simply listing it as a nice bonus.
    E is a great father.  He can 'text it up' with his oldest and make a cave out of our bed with our youngest.  His girls think he hung the moon.
    So take it with a grain of salt when you read the more entertaining posts about him.  He doesn't always say the wrong thing-- I just bust him on it every time he does!

CL

*Unrelated side note that deserved mentioning today:  Baby Duck told E yesterday, "Dad, did you know that cars are just toilets for birds?"

Missing Little Coke

    Today I am missing my grandfather, aka 'Big Grandpa' in his later years; 'Little Coke' in his earlier ones; 'Uncle Henry' for the ones in between.  He passed away in March at the age of 90 and was a prominent presence in my life.  He really should have been over to my house at least three times since then to get a haircut, I keep thinking.  I never got around to making those videos of all his stories about The War and The Depression so my daughters could hear him tell them when they became old enough to appreciate them.
    I recently got a new cell phone and was transferring all my contacts from the old one when I came face to face with something I was having trouble letting go of: Big Grandpa's cell phone number was still in my phone.  Someone else probably has that number by now; it's not like I was going to call it or anything.  I just felt like I would be a bad granddaughter to not have him in my phone.  It was a strangely sad moment when logic won out and I did not add him to the list this time.
    He really couldn't be bothered to worry about what I chose to do, though.  He's far too busy making up for lost time with the love of his life, my wonderful grandmother.  'Auntie Em' and 'Uncle Henry' are together again, and this 'Dorothy' is glad of that.

CL

Passive-Aggressive Husband

    Today on the way to church, Baby Duck said, "Daddy, did you know Mommy's hair is three colors?"  To which he replied, "Yes, baby.  It looks like a Bomb Pop."
Wow.

For the record:  If we are going to be comparing my hair to a frozen treat, I would say it is much more accurate to liken it to Neapolitan ice cream.

CL

Creating A Monster?

    After losing her second tooth last night, Baby Duck told me several times today that she didn't want to smile until at least one of the teeth came in because people would think she looked weird.  I told her she looked beautiful and that she had absolutely nothing to be ashamed of; all of us lose or have lost our baby teeth.  
    A few minutes ago, I heard her say, "Three things I need to be:  Pretty, pretty and pretty."  I called her into the room to suggest that while being pretty was a perk, that she might want to set her goals higher for what she needs to be.  I recommended choices like smart, kind and loving.  
    I'm realizing that I am the mother of two tiny all-too-soon-to-be-young-women.  I am scared to death.

CL

The Most Awesome Thing

    The most awesome thing I saw today:
A lady in Target wearing a very big, very yellow dress... carrying a very big, very yellow reusable bag from Bath and Body Works under her arm... and holding a very big, very yellow box of Cheerios.
    Go ahead.  Picture it.

CL

Exploding Head Syndrome

    It's the middle of the night and I am awake after watching a movie about a homicidal PhD reject.  I was asleep.  The TV woke me up.  I was sleepy, so the best option seemed to be to change the channel so the annoying show would go away.  That's how I ended up watching "Dark Matter".  And now we're back around to me being wide awake.
    Sleep is not coming easy anyway.  E is out of the country on business and I have been working quite a lot more lately due to some management changes at work.  This puts me in a constant cycle of hunting down babysitters, coordinating where my kids are going on my calendar, general disarray of our entire routine... all just in time for me to start wondering what my schedule will be like the next week and how many favors I'm going to have to ask for then.  It's starting to make my skin hurt and I believe I am, in fact, beginning to develop Exploding Head Syndrome.  A common phrase for anyone to hear me saying to no one in particular these days is, "I feel like my brain is leaking out my ears."  I do not think that is a normal thing for a person to regularly say, but I am not certain.
    In other news, I discovered two things today (technically yesterday, I suppose):
1)  Ladybug has an apparent natural knack for movement in the water and has no fear in a swimming pool.
2)  Baby Duck has developed her first tiny freckles.  She looks beautiful.

CL

p.s.  Happy Father's Day!

I'm Not An Actual ADHD Sufferer; I Just Play One On TV.

    I was writing a blog post in my head.  Rather than attempt to explain it, I'm just going to write the interior monologue from my head and let it stand on it's own.
    I have always known that the public library has DVDs.  It has only been the last month or so that I have actually started taking advantage of this, though, due to the difficulty level of selecting a movie.  You have to know what you're looking for, because everything is alphabetical-- no new release section here, folks.  Last time I was there, however, I let my eyes wander past 'Z' to see what else there was.  I knew it was a non-fiction section.  What I did not know was that they have workout DVDs!  My biggest weakness with working out is boredom; I have two yoga DVDs that have just been done to death, so they collect dust.  Now I can go to the library and get a new one every couple of weeks!  I can even dabble in a little Pilates, as I chose to do most recently!  I am going to get in such great shape this way oh my goodness, if E watched 'Alice in Wonderland' while he was out of town I swear I will kill him with my bare hands.  He knows I am very fond of 'Alice' and was really looking forward to seeing this new version.  I even almost went to the theater to see it, which I haven't bothered to do for a movie (that wasn't for my kid) in about 9 years.  I wonder if he thought about this while he was gone and knew it would be one of those little secret 'tests'.  Does anyone else over the age of fourteen do that?  Like, "I know.  If this person really knows me, they will not squeeze the toothpaste from the middle.  They know how much I hate that.  I can assess this person's level of respect for my well-being by how they squeeze the toothpaste."  No?  Just me?  Oh...
    
Well, that's about when my blog account loaded and I was ready to start typing.  So that's what you're going to get today.  Have a super special day!

CL

Stream Of Conciousness

    I have had lots of snippets of thoughts that made me think I should write a blog entry, but none of them have been more than a sentence or two.  Or less.  The result of this thought pattern is a brain full of jumbled mush that I must periodically empty.  So, here you go:
    Ladybug has a pair of pink jelly shoes.  She calls them her 'squids'.  No, I don't know why.  Baby Duck has decided she wants to be a TaeKwon-Do teacher.  If she's going to teach small children, she's going to have to develop more patience than her current teacher seems to possess.  I keep forgetting to buy a handheld mixer to replace the stand mixer E and I got for our wedding that broke at least 6 months ago.  Handheld mixers are cheap.  I'm not even attempting to do anything more than dream of the pretty KitchenAid stand mixer, but for some reason I have endured countless baking ventures without any reasonable ability to properly mix.  It's only, like, 20 bucks.  I really need to do that.  E's birthday is this weekend.  He's a pretty rockin' hubby, so I hope the plans I have for him make him feel totally special.  Ladybug and I went on a shopping adventure-- just the two of us-- earlier this week.  She saw a red balloon tied to a chair and went nuts for it.  I was trying to keep us moving, so I said, "Okay, we'll walk by it.  Say 'hi, balloon!'"  Ladybug said, in the most incredulous tone a 2-1/2 year old can muster, "No, Mommom!  It don't  have a face!"  Duh, Lady.  Enough with the personifying inanimate objects, already!  Baby Duck has another loose tooth.  I kind of hope it doesn't fall out very soon because the permanent tooth hasn't even broken the surface in the empty space next to it yet.  I'm having a neurotic panic attack that all of her teeth are going to shift terribly out of position and she's going to need four years worth of braces if this next tooth falls out.  I'm bored with my hair and thinking of cutting it, which is tremendously stupid to do in the summer when the humidity turns my hair into a snarled-up lion's mane.  A shorter lion's mane does not look any prettier.  I need to just spend the next 3 months with my hair twisted up on my head and deal with 'style' and 'prettiness' and 'not looking like a 12 year old' when the outdoor sauna season ends.  I get a free spicy chicken sandwich at Chick-fil-A tomorrow, and I'm not gonna lie:  I'm unreasonably stoked about it.
    That is all.

CL

Hit And Miss

    The past few days have been much more similar to what I consider a normal journey through potty training:  filled with plenty of hits and a fair amount of misses.  I have to say that when the first accident happened-- about 36 hours into training-- I was a bit caught off guard and didn't know what to do.  But I adjusted and now we're plugging along just fine.
    As a random side note, Ladybug is eating wheat crackers with pesto for lunch.  Ladybug doesn't eat anything.  But, apparently she eats wheat crackers and pesto.  Okay, then.
    As a related random side note, spell checker does not recognize the word pesto.  I am officially concerned about its vocabulary level.
CL

Potty Training

    Ladybug has never been the trial and error type.  She refused to even attempt a step until she had figured out in her head how to walk.  As soon as she physically tried it, she was off and running right away.  She barely uttered a word until she could speak in sentences.  She never wanted to try to count to three; the first time I ever finally heard her count it was all the way to 15.
    Potty training has been no different.  She has been interested in the potty for quite some time, but virtually no success with the exception of when I take her first thing in the morning when she is too sleepy and full of urine to disagree with me.  When I put a diaper on her after that, she wets it without so much as a word.  Pull-ups?  Pees them two minutes after we try to use the toilet.  Naked training?  She spreads her legs when she goes on my floor so she doesn't get wet!  I was really starting to panic that she was just going to be resistant to the idea until kindergarten.  She seemed so ready in so many ways, though, that I thought I might try just one more technique.  I went to the store and bought some panties for her.  Maybe having actual wet underpants would be uncomfortable enough for her to decide on her own to use the toilet.  I had a five days off in a row starting today, so this morning was the day I was going to start working with her.  That way I could be consistent with her for long enough to make it habit.  I started her off this morning by taking her to go potty as usual, but then I put panties on her instead of a diaper.  I explained that we didn't want to potty in them.  So she didn't.  NOT ONCE.  No accidents at all today.  I even ran two 15-20 minute errands today with her in her panties!  When I took Baby Duck to Tae-Kwon Do, I put a Pull-Up on over Ladybug's panties for 'just-in-case' purposes.  We managed to even make it to the restroom while we were there!  I still put a diaper on her for bed, and I am not so crazy as to think we will never have any accidents or setbacks.  I just became more and more amazed as the day went on... until I finally just started to laugh when I thought about the way she has approached everything else in her life.  That girl is one of a kind!

CL

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